Not An Island Podcast
Not An Island Podcast
Ep 7. Church, Worship and Autism | A Family's Perspective
In today's episode we take an intimate turn as we share the practicalities and heartwarming stories of integrating worship into your child's life. We offer an encouraging look at the hurdles we've personally overcome, such as our son's sensitivity to overstimulation at church, and celebrate the milestones reached, all while embedding lessons of sacrificial love into our daily lives. For families walking a similar path, we shed light on resources and share insights that have been lifelines for us, reinforcing the idea that within the challenges of raising children with special needs, there lies a beautiful opportunity to witness pure, unadulterated expressions of worship. Join us as we embrace the unexpected and share our story of faith, love, and the incredible impact of worship on our family's journey.
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Hello and welcome to Not An Island podcast, the series where we talk about family, faith and autism and where those three things meet. We are your hosts. I'm Todd.
Speaker 2:I'm Amanda.
Speaker 1:We are the Johnson's. In today's episode, we're going to be talking about what is the absolute nearest and dearest thing to our heart and how that ties into our family. Raising a child on the spectrum that is the topic of worship.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:That's definitely. I've been looking forward to this so much because this has been just such an incredible journey to be on with raising up your kids and this stuff.
Speaker 1:If there's a silver thread in our life, it is worship. Worship has been the thing that sustains us. It's been the thing that gets us through hard times. It's really been the thing that has helped us see the high points, like the mountains, and be on the top and also be in the valleys. Worship has been the same throughout. In today's episode we're going to be talking about that. We're just going to dive right in.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Yeah, all right. First of all, why do we place worship on such a high regard in our life?
Speaker 2:I think, first and foremost, our love for Jesus and, like you said, the highs and the lows giving him the glory, remaining with the heart of gratitude and thanks and praise, all those things intertwine. But also just laying our lives down daily before the Lord is our sacrifice and our act of worship, absolutely Worship for us. I think it comes out in so many different ways for so many different people, but I feel like almost always it leads us to praise, it leads us to open up our mouth and either declare his goodness, whether we're just saying it or singing it or playing it on an instrument or whatever expression, or white painting, whatever way that it comes out, I feel like everybody has a different expression.
Speaker 1:Me too. I think if we are such a diverse people like if humanity is so diverse, the Lord made us in individual ways, like he made us all unique. That's the word I was looking for unique. He made us unique in a way that we express ourselves and our love to him uniquely.
Speaker 2:I think it's just such a pleasure and a delight to his heart to receive each of our unique expressions of worship to him.
Speaker 1:Worship has been something that has been with us since day one of us really getting our lives right and giving our lives to him. Worship has been around since before our children. That's what drives us to this. Next point is when Ezra came into the story. What did that look like for us? Let's talk about day one, when Ezra was screaming all through the night. What did worship look like?
Speaker 2:I know for me. I played a lot of worship songs over him. I sang a lot of worship songs over him. I needed to have my heart and my mind in an atmosphere of praise and worship to make it through what we were facing. You're talking about him screaming all night. His babyhood was extremely difficult.
Speaker 1:You had a traumatic few years there.
Speaker 2:For us it was just shell shock. I think for any person bringing a new child into the world, it changes everything about your life. No doubt For us it was even on another level. I think Worship really grounded me. It also showed me just being in that place of worship before the Lord. It showed me a lot about who Ezra was and who he was going to be. Yeah For sure.
Speaker 1:I think it's so important to do that. It's so important to be in a heart of worship and have a heart of gratitude, because it does. It places you in the place in your heart to where you can receive really just what the Lord has over someone's life. Be able to see that almost like see into your imagination of what your child's life is going to look like and how you play a role in that A very important role. Through the first few years, ezra was inundated in worship. That's something we did as a family at home. We would do it at church Every day. When I was at work, amanda would be playing worship from a house of prayer kind of close to us. It's called Upper Room. We'd have Upper Room on the TV. When I was home on weekends it was Upper Room on the TV a lot. Our son learned a lot about who he is, I think, through worship. He's an extremely confident child and I don't know that he would understand as much as he does even about himself if it weren't for that.
Speaker 2:I think it's hard because, with him not having verbal language for such a long time, we weren't sure how much you know he was, what he was catching or what he was catching onto. But my goal and my aim, raising Ezra, was to cultivate an atmosphere of worship that you know that there was. His presence was evident in our home and in Ezra's life. That when, if he was in a place where he, you know, he could tell the difference you know what I'm saying. Like he and he did, he clearly could. When, you know, when he was in the presence of something more evil or something off, you know, he could sense that because he was being raised in the peace and in the presence of God. And so and he still knows his presence very well and he's dependent on the presence of God wholeheartedly.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, and you might be skeptical. You might be asking how on earth could a child at that age know the presence of God and know that, that it changes things? Well, I have a story for you.
Speaker 2:Ezra was seven.
Speaker 1:sorry, ezra is seven, but when he was five years old still, he was in his first year of school and there was this little girl. We might have told the story in another episode, but there was this little girl and she was having a hard time, she was having a meltdown, she also had autism and she was non-verbal. Well, ezra being the child he was, you know just, he had a heart for all of his classmates. See, he would name them coming home.
Speaker 2:That was one of the things he would do. He still does. Yeah, we know them all. All thought their names.
Speaker 1:The teacher and the aides. They kind of had a hard time dealing with this girl and one day she was in the middle of a pretty hard meltdown and Ezra walks up to her and he wraps his arms around her and he didn't sing wheels on the bus. He didn't sing nursery rhymes. He's saying Jesus loves me.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And when our five year old boy saying Jesus loves me to her and was hugging her, her meltdown immediately stopped and they instantly became best friends. After that, and so often throughout that year he would do that.
Speaker 2:He would sing that, which, for Ezra Todd's, you know, listing off the nursery rhymes. The majority of Ezra's language came through song. That's how he learned language and so he loves to this day nursery rhymes. But Jesus loves me was different for him and we would sing it over him when he was having a meltdown and we'd watch the panic and the whole thing that was, you know, taking over him dissipate in a moment and he would ask for Jesus loves me when he felt overwhelmed.
Speaker 2:That's one of our like calm down strategies is to play Jesus loves me and I really believe that song is almost like a song of deliverance. It's just like, you know, putting your eyes on the one who loves you and created you. And I think for Ezra that's like a safe space for him and he knew if this other child is having a meltdown just like I have meltdowns if I sing this song over her, if I, you know, invite her into this thing that helps me calm down, it'll calm her down and his little mind. He knew what to do and he just sang it over her and that meltdown stopped. So it was incredible.
Speaker 1:So yes, a small child can know the presence of God and a small child can recognize and utilize the presence of God in situations that may not be so inviting or may not even be so blatantly the place to do that you know, so absolutely, and so we're going on to the next point. So how, we kind of covered a little bit of that, but how do we do it? What does worship look like as a family in private? We'll start with that.
Speaker 2:So for since Ezra was a bitty baby, I would push the couch back and I had what I called carpet time and I would play, you know prayer room, or just worship music or even just sing over him and he would dance and sometimes he'd just lay there and he just enjoyed worshiping with me.
Speaker 2:I mean, he was crawling around on his knees from the time. He was just crawling around, that's just. I have video after video of us just spending those times together and we bought him a little ukulele and he started like strumming on his ukulele and he also would just use anything resembling a flag and just wave it and that's just been like our special time. And to this day, if he's home and I do the same thing, he usually just lays on the floor and he just closes his eyes. And I've never told him to wave a flag. I never told him to lay on the floor, I never told him to do any of those things. He just he responds to the presence of his maker and it is really really beautiful, in a very natural way.
Speaker 2:He's super sensitive to the Lord and that's just an answered prayer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, for sure, in private, like we hold a high regard to that we hold a high regard to worship and inviting our children in, because they need to see the example.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and he also grew up like us, todd and I, being worship leaders. He grew up in worship practice and he was constantly around musicians and singing, and all of that from a very young age as well, and that's been a big part of his life, which brings me to my next point at church. What does it?
Speaker 1:look like at church. We'll just talk about the past.
Speaker 2:It's been different in different seasons.
Speaker 1:We'll talk about the past year, so beginning of, we'll say, the beginning of 2023, it was rough.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:It was rough.
Speaker 2:Well, I would say it's been very difficult for him to be in a service. Now, if he's sent back in children's church with the kids, that's a different story, but it can be extremely overstimulating with, you know, louder music and all of those things. And then there's also for Ezra, wide open spaces.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, and instruments.
Speaker 2:And instruments. He has his jaw. He's so gravitated he wants to jump on the drum set, he wants to jump on the guitar, and that's been for years, I think he's just like he just wants to run for the stage and he just wants to run around and it's really hard to like keep him seated. But here recently we've been visiting some churches that have the children in worship and it's been really neat for us to witness him do an amazing job. There's sometimes he just needs to go in the lobby and he's overwhelmed and he can't sit.
Speaker 1:And take him in the lobby and sit with them.
Speaker 2:But his newfound love and passion for, like drawing and art. The past couple of times we've been in worship he's drawing, you know, the entire worship service and through the service and, of course, waving his flag and yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1:That's kind of how it's been at church recently. That's what it's turned into is him being able to express himself freely and you know it's been baby steps for us to okay we can let go of his hand right now. So you know, maybe he won't run away. Hopefully he won't bolt yeah hopefully he won't bolt and but it's been good. He's been transitioning to being more independent in public places, especially at church, and it's so massive in our life.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's incredible to witness, for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and the last thing in our lives, in the day to day instance of worship, what that looks like and how that happens in our lives. I think you hit it on the head earlier when you talked about our lives being sacrificial.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That it being a thing of sacrifice, being a form of worship, for sure. What we mean by that is that we lay down our wants and our needs all the time for our children, especially for our child when he's having a hard time, maybe having a meltdown, maybe not understanding, we'll lay down our own wants and needs to take care of him, and that is worship.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That is. It sounds crazy, but it is. You're serving the Lord by serving your children. Yes, and that'll man that'll teach you so much about the nature of God when you are loving your child.
Speaker 2:It's like it's not, it's much easier said than done, but it's like how could we not extend the love that's been extended to us, you know, and the patience and the mercy and all of those things. And you know if, if you're cultivating an atmosphere of worship and praise and gratitude in your personal life and in your home, it's much easier to love your children well, absolutely, because you have the perfect example in the one who created you.
Speaker 1:You know so yeah, and then our next point we're gonna talk about the practical. We've discussed a little bit of practicals but what do we do, Amanda, if he's overstimulated?
Speaker 2:So one of the biggest aids for a lot of different activities and where there's overstimulation are noise canceling headphones. Oh yeah, for sure that is a huge help to Ezra.
Speaker 1:Even just ear muffs.
Speaker 2:It just ear muffs, and it doesn't even have to be a loud situation, it just. It may not be loud to us, but if there's a whole lot of people talking in a room, that's extremely overwhelming. You know, to him that's one of the best practicals Having an iPad or tablet or something to kind of divert and distract. Redirection, redirect.
Speaker 1:We'll even sometimes use. If people are waving flags in church, we'll use flags as redirection. We've found that that tends to work actually.
Speaker 2:He really enjoys doing that.
Speaker 1:It gets him engrossed in that, like you know, waving flags. I know not all churches do that, but that's something that he really loves.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:You gotta kind of stay with him because he spins like a tornado and tends to run into people when he's doing it. But it's still something he loves and it's a way to redirect Once again. Going back to the sacrificial thing, we're sacrificing our time in the midst of a worship service with our child. We're sacrificing our time to be with him and oversee him, but that even still is a form of worship.
Speaker 2:It is, and you know, I found even in some of the most stressful moments I'm like I just don't know if this is working like having our children in worship. But then the Lord speaks to me about them during that time and just shows me you know even greater who he's created them to be, and shows me, you know, just a snapshot of their life and what their worship will be like as adults, and it just ministers to me to see them worship for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, no doubt, and that's I think. If there's one thing our children will know when they're adults, it's who they are in Christ.
Speaker 2:For sure. And really how to engage into being with him in his presence comfortably, you know, and I know we're talking about a little bit more of a glossed over as far as like how things have been lately, but church was a really, really, really hard place for a long time oh man and I know that's kind of the topic we're on is.
Speaker 2:You know, being in corporate settings, ezra had a lot of separation, anxiety and different things and it made it hard for us to be able to engage in worship because he was, you know, really struggling. And so to any of you who may be going through that right now and you're listening to us talk and it just sounds like so great and you're like this could never be my child, you know this too shall pass and there may come a time where your child's really gonna surprise you. I think it's vital that you continue to go and you continue to expose them to those situations, because breakthrough comes Like things do change eventually and it may not be on when you expect it, but you know, and you're gonna have good days and bad days regardless. But I just thought I'd throw that in there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and also on that note, we're gonna stop here and say if you have questions, maybe you have tips, maybe you have something that you want to share in the comments. If you're watching on YouTube right now, leave a comment, leave a tip for other parents to go to and say oh, okay, that that actually helps. Yeah, I can try that, yeah, or if you have questions and you want us to maybe share some more personally with you one on one, shoot us an email.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Not an island podcast at gmailcom. We'd love to talk to you and be able to help you in any way that we can and, if not, lock arms with you and and be in the trenches with you along the way. So, um, but yeah, I was going to continue. On what else? Kids worship channels on YouTube.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, listener kids shout out. Shout out, listener kids.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Totally unsponsored, of course, yeah, but, man, that we really really enjoy what they've done. And to hear your children echo back, Um, just these praise songs that are so catchy and so easy for them to you know hear and listen to and just you know respond to, it's really cool.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, uh, and those are the ways that we've found practically to like uh navigate this, uh raising a child on the spectrum as believers of Jesus, as Christians, and so, uh, we have one more big thing to share with you, and that's it's. It's important, and that's kind of Amanda's story about kind of what really changed her view on things all the way around.
Speaker 2:So yeah, um, so when Ezra was a baby, I attended a women's conference and initially, when we were going into it, there was, you know, like the prep. They were practicing, the worship um team was practicing and there was this little girl and she was making a lot of noises and moving her body in odd ways and and things like that. And at the place that I was in, in my heart, my mind, I just fear, kind of gripped me when I saw it and I thought like man, you know, I hope she's okay or you know, is something, is something evil going on?
Speaker 1:almost Like there was just all these different questions, like well, for context, at the time, you are not um accustomed to.
Speaker 2:No, I was not a special needs. I didn't know I was going to be a special needs parent at that point in time and and I just didn't understand and and so I think a lot of people can relate to this If you don't have a child with special needs and you've witnessed something like that and so, um, as the time went on, like I think it was the second day or something we were actually worshiping. This little girl is is doing, you know, the same thing again and the Lord just rebuked me, and in the most gentle way, and was like Amanda, I want, he just focused in on this little girl and he said the incense, like the praise, the worship that's rising from this little girl is the most pure in the room. And it stopped being my tracks because I realized, you know, this little girl has special needs and she loved worship and I actually found that out.
Speaker 2:Um, afterwards I was talking to some of the leadership and the. The lady who was hosting and putting this entire thing on her heart was to adopt special needs children and she had adopted like five or six kids and this one little girl. She always had her in the worship practice. She always had her in worship because she just loved the presence of God and um she knew that that's what that girl needed.
Speaker 2:Yes, and and, and it really ministered to me so deeply. You know, the Lord beckons us to come as little children, and the purity and the innocence of this girl and and I think it just has been reflected in my own life, in mothering a child with special needs, um, I never forgot that, and so to see Ezra engage the Lord in worship is one of the most prized possessions of my life.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:He is so pure and he's so innocent and he's so um believing and yeah, it's just genuine. Yes, totally genuine. Yeah, but there's been times where things have happened and people have been afraid of things Ezra's done.
Speaker 1:Misunderstood.
Speaker 2:Or misunderstood him or thought, oh, there's something possibly evil or something wrong going on. Um with Ezra. And you know people have made these different comments to me and in those moments that's things and that hurts and you're just like, oh, if you only knew. But then you remember that you were once that person who the Lord so gently rebuked and showed you how pure and beautiful the worship was coming from this little girl. And so it's. It's just a like a full circle kind of moment. For sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but so ending that with two very important points. One don't be discouraged. Take your child, expose your child expose your children to the presence of God, whether you have to do it at home, whether you can do it in a, in a body, at a church or uh, whatever you have to do, it's important, it's so vital. Number two just what she said if people are misunderstanding you, misunderstanding your children, maybe they might not understand really why.
Speaker 2:Maybe your child's so hyper, or maybe you're or screeching or throwing themselves on the floor.
Speaker 1:Listen just give them the same grace that she even described that the Lord gave her and the Lord has given you. You know the Lord has entrusted you to care for that child and those children and it's okay if people misunderstand. That actually is part of your child's mission on this earth is to help people understand the spirit of God over their lives. And so with that, today we talked about worship. We kind of dove deep in some areas and stayed shallow in others, but we did, we talked about worship.
Speaker 1:We really hope that today you all can go away from this with some really strong takeaways, some encouragement, some hope. That's our heart for this whole thing. So, if you got anything out of this, please, please, please, share. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to our channel If you're hearing this on podcasts. If you're on Instagram or TikTok wherever you're seeing this follow, subscribe, share, rate and review. Please review our stuff on podcasts. It's so important. It helps us get into the algorithm. It helps people hear really the good news.
Speaker 2:I'm clueless to all that but Todd's the one he knows.
Speaker 1:So please help us out with that. Yeah and yeah. We really hope it's impacted you today in a very positive way. Once again, reach out to us if you have questions, not an island podcast, at gmailcom. Well, all right, I guess that wraps it up. You wanna pray?
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. So, jesus, we just thank you for every listener today and every person who's raising a child, whether they have special needs or not. Lord, we just thank you that they would create an atmosphere of worship in their home, that their children would know the presence of God, and that the peace of God would dwell within their home and would bring peace to their children in the hardest storms and meltdowns and things that seem impossible from the outside. God, we just give you all the glory and the honor for this podcast, for this time of just getting to share about worship with Ezra. We love you in Jesus name, amen.
Speaker 1:Amen, well, I'm Todd.
Speaker 2:I'm Amanda.
Speaker 1:And we are the Johnson's. This is not an island podcast, and until next time, bye.
